Who is Driving Your Bus?

If we think about our own lives as being a journey on a bus, surrounded by a great variety of people, all with particular positions on our bus that relate to where they fit into our lives. Some are right there next to us; some behind us; some in front of us… but all are important in playing some role in how we are “positioned” in their lives, and they in ours. Remember we always have a choice…sit, stand, whom next to, get off the bus, get on another, stay silent, speak, engage, learn, follow, lead, be influenced or to influence….the choice is almost always ours.

As I write this I am reminded of the movie “Speed” with Sandra Bullock and Keanu Reeves – where they were all on a bus being controlled by a maniac demanding a ransom. There are times when we do not have a choice at least it may seem that way. The truth is  our lives can be like that; out of control, with someone else doing the driving. Do you want that ? A fearful situation? Of course it is! Even in that scenario, did Keanu simply decide to simply do everything the maniac was demanding, no way Hosea, he was working on a plan….a plan to solve things, change the situation, get control and not be controlled.

The brutal truth is that so many people are living-out that nightmare bus-ride right now! Out of control – and don’t know what they can do about it. Do you want to simply ride and see what happens ? Give in and allow situations to rule you ? What can you do…more importantly what are you willing to do ?

OK, now that you’ve got the scene in your mind. In order to get some perspective on our own lives, sometimes we need to move to the back seat of the bus for a while, and become the observer of what is really going on. Sometimes you need to ask the right questions, just as Keanu figured out the maniac was observing them, watching their every move and therefore knowing what to do. He had to change that situation so he got help created a loop in the video feed to buy time, to execute a plan, to change the situation and get back control.

We also need to observe who the most significant people are, and how they are positioned in our lives. Keanu did not do this alone, he got help. We all need people in our lives whom contribute in different ways. Some give us Love & Belonging, some Significance & Recognition and yet others provide us with the stimulus of Challenge & Growth. We must understand our emotional drivers and use that knowledge to help move us in the right direction and speed. Whom we hang with will affect us, either positively or negatively.

Are they standing over us because they feel superior? Are they moving forward in their own lives and leaving us behind? Are they falling behind us because we’ve chosen to move forward? Where are you at in your life ?  Whom have you allowed to influence you ? Are you influencing others ? Are you simply going for a ride or do you know where your bus is going and how you are going to get to your destination ?

So now we are faced with an important question, “Who’s driving your bus”?

Is it someone from your past who has dominated you and what you do, even though they may not still be present in your life now? Are they taking you where you want to go? Do you feel like you would like to the bus to stop and let you off? Now here comes the challenge…

From this rear seat of observation, we need to start to move closer to the driver’s seat. You cannot really influence the driver from the back seat. It doesn’t matter how long this takes, and it doesn’t matter how much we are challenged by the people who may be trying to block our progress forward. We have to do this for ourselves… starting right now! So get off the back seat and start moving forward !

Our goal is to be in the driver’s seat of our own lives! Do you know what drives you ? Do you know your emotional drivers ? I will get into this in a another article for now, just know it’s important to be in the driver’s seat.

It is inevitable that we are going to be challenged, and that’s when we need courage!
Yes – we will all take different lengths of time to move forward… that’s when we need persistence, and patience with ourselves!

Most certainly we will feel daunted at times by this process… that’s when we need to have determination!

We are going to have to ask people to vacate their seats (which can possibly be their dominant positions in our lives) so that we can move forward towards that front seat we wish to occupy. We are going to have to sit in the middle of the bus at times while we learn to muster more courage and determination to move forward again. This is all part of the process, so stick with it because this is all for YOU! If you don’t help yourself who will ?

During this process of moving forward we must remain conscious of where the bus is now, and think about where we really want to take it once we’re up front, and in control. Pointless to get into the driver’s seat and not know where to go and the best route to get you there.

One very important point! At no stage in this process do we tread on someone if they get in our way (as we move forward), simply step around them and move on.

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