Who is driving Your Bus ?

If we think about our own lives as being a journey on a bus, surrounded by a great variety of people, all with particular positions on our bus that relate to where they fit into our lives. Some are right there next to us; some behind us; some in front of us… but all are important in playing some role in how we are “positioned” in their lives, and they in ours. Remember we always have a choice…sit, stand, whom next to, get off the bus, get on another, stay silent, speak, engage, learn, follow, lead, be influenced or to influence….the choice is almost always ours.

As I write this I am reminded of the movie “Speed” with Sandra Bullock and Keanu Reeves – where they were all on a bus being controlled by a maniac demanding a ransom. There are times when we do not have a choice at least it may seem that way. The truth is our lives can be like that; out of control, with someone else doing the driving. Do you want that ? A fearful situation? Of course it is! Even in that scenario, did Keanu simply decide to simply do everything the maniac was demanding, no way Hosea, he was working on a plan….a plan to solve things, change the situation, get control and not be controlled.

The brutal truth is that so many people are living-out that nightmare bus-ride right now! Out of control – and don’t know what they can do about it. Do you want to simply ride and see what happens ? Give in and allow situations to rule you ? What can you do…more importantly what are you willing to do ?

OK, now that you’ve got the scene in your mind. In order to get some perspective on our own lives, sometimes we need to move to the back seat of the bus for a while, and become the observer of what is really going on.

Sometimes you need to ask the right questions, just as Keanu figured out the maniac was observing them, watching their every move and therefore knowing what to do. He had to change that situation so he got help created a loop in the video feed to buy time, to execute a plan, to change the situation and get back control.

We also need to observe who the most significant people are, and how they are positioned in our lives. Keanu did not do this alone, he got help. We all need people in our lives whom contribute in different ways. Some give us Love & Belonging, some Significance & Recognition and yet others provide us with the stimulus of Challenge & Growth. We must understand our emotional drivers and use that knowledge to help move us in the right direction and speed. Whom we hang with will affect us, either positively or negatively.

Are they standing over us because they feel superior? Are they moving forward in their own lives and leaving us behind? Are they falling behind us because we’ve chosen to move forward? Where are you at in your life ? Whom have you allowed to influence you ? Are you influencing others ? Are you simply going for a ride or do you know where your bus is going and how you are going to get to your destination ?

So now we are faced with an important question, “Who’s driving your bus”?
Is it someone from your past who has dominated you and what you do, even though they may not still be present in your life now? Are they taking you where you want to go? Do you feel like you would like to the bus to stop and let you off? Now here comes the challenge…

From this rear seat of observation, we need to start to move closer to the driver’s seat. You cannot really influence the driver from the back seat. It doesn’t matter how long this takes, and it doesn’t matter how much we are challenged by the people who may be trying to block our progress forward. We have to do this for ourselves… starting right now! So get off the back seat and start moving forward !

Our goal is to be in the driver’s seat of our own lives! Do you know what drives you ? Do you know your emotional drivers ? I will get into this in a another article for now, just know it’s important to be in the driver’s seat.

It is inevitable that we are going to be challenged, and that’s when we need courage!

Yes – we will all take different lengths of time to move forward… that’s when we need persistence, and patience with ourselves!

Most certainly we will feel daunted at times by this process… that’s when we need to have determination!

We are going to have to ask people to vacate their seats (which can possibly be their dominant positions in our lives) so that we can move forward towards that front seat we wish to occupy. We are going to have to sit in the middle of the bus at times while we learn to muster more courage and determination to move forward again. This is all part of the process, so stick with it because this is all for YOU! If you don’t help yourself who will ?

During this process of moving forward we must remain conscious of where the bus is now, and think about where we really want to take it once we’re up front, and in control. Pointless to get into the driver’s seat and not know where to go and the best route to get you there.

One very important point! At no stage in this process do we tread on someone if they get in our way (as we move forward), simply step around them and move on.

OK – you’ve made it! You have asked the driver to step aside and let you have your turn, and now you’re in the seat. It’s all up to you now!

If you’re not too sure of what to do and how to do it, just stop and park for a while. It doesn’t matter what you do and how long it takes, because this is your game now – so play it your way!

Get crystal clear on where you choose to take your bus now, and very clear on who you wish to accompany you on this new journey. The rest is a process of trusting your own judgment and decisions. You will make modifications or alterations to your plan along the way….this is normal. This will also include the people that will help you get there….they do not necessarily stay the same…know what, when where and also whom….this will get you to your destination.

I wish the very best for the journey ahead… and always remember – “What other people do or say is their responsibility or as one of my dear associates likes to say it’s their stuff; how we react is our stuff , yes, is our responsibility.” Yes it’s up to “moi”!

Leslie Choudhury – Int’l Speaker, Trainer, Consultant and Author

Serious fun for serious business

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Principles for Success

People are not born successful.

They work hard and are extremely focused and persistent. Successful people take calculated risks and solve their problems creatively. Some of the characteristics that most successful people have in common are:

1.  Emotional Intelligence.

  Most great people are somewhat intelligent–but not in every subject. They specialize. They simply have well-develop intelligence in the areas or fields they have chosen to pursue. It is said that IQ will get you hired in a job, but EQ will either get you promoted or the lack of it will get you fired! When you can learn to respond with both your heart and head then it is advantage. Great people know what makes another ‘tick’ both in the head and in their heart!

2. Practice.

Almost all-great people have spent many years practicing their particular talents. Mistakes must be made, new solutions discovered, and difficult situations endured. Nobody great , in sports or business got good without practice! David Beckham in his deadly free-kicks, or Tiger Woods (see picture) in his record Golf PGA wins, Donald Trump in his real estate success, or even Tony Robbins in his motivation business! Nothing great can be achieved without practice.

3.  Leadership.

Many successful people have a tremendous amount of hands-on experience dealing with people or structuring an organization. The bible says “Where there is no vision, the people perish.”  Today in order to achieve success, we must be willing to lead, to take leadership, to share your vision and get people behind you, your idea, your product and your service.

4. Energy.

They’re very active and involved in their particular work. Their high activity levels spring partly from tremendous enthusiasm and excitement for the things they are doing. ‘Enthusiasm begets Enthusiasm!’ No one achieves success by dragging their feet across the finish line. If we want to achieve success we must inspire others to be as interested, as energetic, as enthused as we are. People are swayed by another’s energy and enthusiasm.

5.  Concentration or Focus.

Their work really excites them–so much so that they become unaware of everything else. Look at Roger Federer in tennis, Steve Jobs in Apple, they get so stuck in what they want to achieve, so focussed on the outcome that  they achieve their goals.

6.  Determination.

They develop senses of destiny. They believe that they have major purposes. They can’t imagine themselves failing. When they suffer setbacks, they view them as part of the learning process on the road to greatness.

7. Survival Skills.

Many have suffered traumatic experiences early in life such as sickness, loneliness, or poverty. Such experiences helped them develop their robustness and persistence. People who can’t cope with failure are not likely to succeed. Donald Trump failed many times as did many, many others. Falling down is common, I have and so have you. What matters most is picking yourself up and finding a new way to survive and succeed!

 9.  Letting experience teach them.

They learn from life’s experiences by making a conscious effort to do so. Many people get caught up in what or who is right or wrong instead of looking at the lesson that can be learned from the experience. And life is full of lessons. From the time we come out of the womb to the day we die, we are learning what life has to offer us, lesson after lesson. The key is to take the experiences-those everyday occurrences in life-and use them to change and grow. That’s what life is all really-change. The only real constant in this life is that things and people change. Inspired by experience, change is all around.

We can all benefit by watching successful people. But the knowledge that each of us has the potential to be successful should be foremost in our minds as we proceed in life. Each of us has a unique ability or talent that can be developed. Believe in yourself and know yourself. These two qualities serve as a foundation for the other characteristics great people exhibit.

Start Today ….Know Yourself…. Believe in Yourself !

See It, Be It, Live It !!!

www.lesliechoudhury.com

Choose Greatness !!!

Take the following statement to heart, and carry it with you always…

“Trust that life has an amazing way of filling in the details for the person who has the courage to get started in the direction of their dreams.”

When I really grasped the above statement, to the point that I began to try and truly live my life in this way, I began to see a big difference. Really BIG.

In the work I do, speaking, teaching and inspiring people on responsibility & their potential — I’ve seen time and time again, people held hostage, stuck in inaction because they couldn’t move past the idea that they had the potential, had to be guaranteed success before getting started, and two, had to have every single little detail all nailed down in their own mind before beginning in the first place.

Being a planner is fine, it’s smart in fact. That said, making the mistake of waiting to have every single detail figured out just right before beginning is often a recipe for unrealized hopes and dreams.

The reason that’s true is because the pursuit of one’s endeavours is a moving target. In fact in many cases one finds that it requires of us the ability to move and adjust as new challenges appear. It’s part of the very process which goes into shaping us and teaching us the needed skills which allow us to become the type of person who is worthy of the goals we so strongly desire.

So while it’s good to plan, and follow your plan… don’t make the mistake of never getting started in the first place. When you find yourself in a place which requires some adjusting, embrace it, and accept that it’s part of the process. Course correct and get back to taking whatever actions you have identified that will get you to where you want to be. Be nimble when your success journey requires you to do so.

Keep in mind the old truth which says, “life is but a journey.” It’s true, and like any worthwhile journey there will be moments where you need to veer from the path you thought was required of you. You may very well have uncomfortable moments from time to time. You will most likely experience feelings of doubt at some point. Fear not. Stay the course.

Whenever necessary, reach out and learn from those people and resources who can help you acquire whatever particular skill-set you need in order to move past whatever challenge may pop up, and continue moving right along where you left off.

Make persistence your ally and you will look back with pride as you recount the many achievements you’ve experienced in life. Remember the simple truth… You’ve got to be in it to win it!

Each and everyday embrace and honour the greatness inside you by moving forward on the path you have chosen. You’re an artist, and your life is the canvas upon which you can paint whatever you wish.
Remember…
It’s your life, Choose Your Path.