The average person on the street, when asked what behavior modification is, gets a glassy look in their eyes and usually just stares in silence… unable to respond. The ones that do have an answer often say something about rewards for good behavior or punishment for bad behavior.
That’s understandable, because after all, that is what typically drives human behavior.
Physical or emotional pain stops us from doing things that do (or might) cause it.
And we do the things, moment-by-moment that we believe will give us physical and emotional pleasure.
But if that were the only way to change our behaviors, we’d be doomed.
Hmmm that’s why our prisons are filled !
Because most times that doesn’t work, not with the number of temptations each of us is faced with every day.
For example, as good as drugs (both legal and not) can make us feel, many people still are able to fight the temptation.
In fact for most people, they are not tempting at all. It is something most people never ever think about.
And as tempting as it might be for many to eat only the super delicious, great smelling packaged chemical “food-like” substances available at every turn today, many people still are easily able to walk right by.
And as easy as it would be to avoid picking up our messes, to never do laundry, to avoid daily grooming, to kill the people we hate, or to sit in a bar all day keeping a permanent buzz on, many people have no compulsion to do any of those things… even though they were never beaten or threatened with bodily harm or even promised great rewards for acting the way they do now with no apparent effort.
Because it is habit, not pain or pleasure, that is the greatest director of human behavior.
You see we are more like trains than cars.
Cars can go off-road, but trains must stay on their tracks… their destinations are predetermined.
And that is how most humans are, once we’ve developed our habits. We become slaves to those habits.
Our habitual ways of thinking defines us, and our habitual patterned thoughts guide almost all our behaviors.
That is why, for instance, I could give a thousand people the most authoritative, proven course that shows them exactly what to do and say, and when to do it and say it… and still 990 out of those thousand will fail to do anything even though there are promises of riches or success beyond their wildest dreams.
This is because it is not pleasure that rules.
It is ……..H A B I T.
This is also why you might have dozens or even hundreds of excellent “how to” books, tapes and videos on your shelves and in your basement collecting dust.
Because habit rules.
As a training company, we look at many techniques for changing emotions and behaviors.
Understanding your Emotional Drivers are fundamental. First step is awareness.
Knowing that emotional drivers can and do change.
Ask yourself is the current primary drivers that you have what is needed to achieve your goals ?
Do you need to change your drivers ?
What emotional drivers do you need to attain your goals ?
How do you then develop the right habits because they are linked.
To help us eliminate “bad” habits and replace them with good ones we need simple mental conditioning using mental pictures where we are in the pictures.
We need to see ourselves doing the things we need to do, developing the right habits and therefore reaping the benefits it will give us.
After all, we humans have just three dominant senses:
Our sight (past, current and imagined future vision),
Our hearing (remembered, current and imagined), and
Our feeling or emotions (from the past, present and imagined futures).
Sow a Thought ( a mental picture ) and we will Reap an Action
Sow an Action and we will Reap a Habit
Sow a Habit and we will Reap the benefits, the success, the goals etc……it start with the thought …that mental picture !
By using mental pictures, and re-enforcing it with right words, speech etc as we do in our thought and behavior modification work.
This is where our environment come to play, whom we associate with, what they say, what we allow ourselves to hear and therefore how we let our environment also influence us. A supportive environment / group / will enable to get there much faster !
We can quickly change emotions, and our Emotional Drivers which directly affects all decisions and actions.
And isn’t that the whole purpose behind “self-help” and “personal development?”
Isn’t the purpose of it all to change how you feel and what you do?
Do either of those two things – change how you feel and change what you do – and all of your hopes, dreams, aspirations, ambitions and goals will be yours.
Isn’t that so?
So if you do not feel how you want to feel and if you cannot get yourself to do what you need to do, to make those dreams come true, then they won’t happen.
So once again, we come to grips with a powerful tool….a tool to help you change your habits, a tool to help change your emotional drivers, and therefore a tool to change the outcomes, the results, the attainment of your goals and accomplishment of your vision.
But remember its up to “Moi” !!!