Self Confidence – part 1 of 3

Confidence is a tool you can use in your everyday life.
It’s something you need to be able to achieve all kinds of cool stuff, not least to stop second-guessing yourself, manage your fears and become able to do more of the things that really matter to you.

But not many people realise that their self-confidence works just like a muscle – it grows in response to the level of performance required of it. Either you use it or you lose it. 

That’s why I’ve shared with you below… ‘em’ just a few ways to grow your confidence so that you can become a giant.

1. Learning is a Good Thing, so sign up for that webinar, evening or weekend class and enjoy it.

2. Get out of your own head by asking your family, partner, colleague or best friend what you can do for them today.

3. Hit the gym. The physiological effects will leave you feeling great.

4. Go to a networking event and focus on how you can be helpful to other people rather than being nervous about your own stuff.

5. Get crystal clear on the things that truly matter to you. If they’re not in your life, you need to bring them in.

6. Write a list of the things you’re putting up with in your life, then write down how you can remove, minimise or diminish each one.

7. Look at a great win or success you’ve experienced and give yourself credit for your part in it. Recognising your achievements is not egotistical, it’s healthy.

8. Next time you’re at a social event, don’t just stick with the people you know – go and have a conversation with someone you don’t know and you never know what – or who – you’ll discover.
9. Next time you talk yourself out of doing something (an invitation, a challenging project or whatever else), say ‘Nothing Ventured, Nothing Gained’ and go do it.
10. Do one thing each day that makes you smile (on the inside or on the outside).
11. Look for the patterns of thought that take you to a place where you start second-guessing or over-thinking. Now imagine that your best friend is in exactly the same thought process and ended up holding herself/himself back – what would you want to say to them?
12.  You have to keep your mind well fed, so write a list of 20 things that keeps your mind feeling nourished and make sure you’re giving them room in your life.
13. Start playing different roles and stop squeezing yourself into boxes based on what you think people expect you to act like.
14. Learn to catch yourself every single time you tell yourself that you can’t have, won’t get or aren’t good enough to get what you want. Watch what you say to yourself, make sure you focus on the positives.
15. Take yourself off auto-pilot – make deliberate decisions on what really matters to you.
16. Next time you come up against a risk or a challenge, listen to what you tell yourself and look for a way that that inner dialog can be improved. Ask yourself, “What would make this easier?”
17. Scared of looking silly?  It’s no biggie so don’t let it stop you. It helps to be able to laugh at yourself sometimes, its healthy. Say it with me – “It just doesn’t matter.”  It’s always Mind over Matter, if you don’t mind it won’t matter!

18. Don’t think for a second that you can’t be confident. There are already loads of things you do with natural self-confidence, you just have to notice them and get familiar with how it feels.

19. Look for the things you do where the question of whether you’re confident enough never arises.

20. Listen to your gut but be ready to make deliberate decisions once you’ve heard them. Sometimes your gut is there to let you know what you need to prepare for, so you can use it to your benefit as you move forward.

21. Think of a time when it felt like a whole bank of switches in your head flicked to the on position and you were firing on all cylinders. What were you doing and what’s the reason it felt so great?

22. You’ve got a whole bunch of out-dated rules that determine what you do, don’t do, should do and shouldn’t do. These rules limit your thinking and limit your behaviour. Tear up your rule book and notice how free you are to make great decisions.

23. Do you get annoyed with yourself because you didn’t make the most of something or stepped back form an opportunity? Don’t beat yourself up because that’s just going to make you feel worse. Instead, be brutally honest and ask yourself what you gained from the situation and what you lost out on. Based on this win/lose balance, what’s a different choice you can make next time?

24. If you’d already done everything in life you’d have no need to be scared. Don’t ever think that being scared means you’re not confident, it simply means you’re going somewhere new.
These are just 24 things to consider (more to come with part 2 & 3) putting into practise.  I guarantee you if you try and put some of these into play, your confidence will grow. I am living proof of a person who wasn’t a picture of confidence growing up but by taking steps like those cited above, my confidence grew, little by little , day by day.

“You are as Confident as You Allow Yourself To Be !” – Leslie Choudhury

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